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Spinach and First Dates

Wednesday, June 25th, 2014

FirstDates

A dear friend of mine is dating, and that got me thinking about my own dating experiences.  She’s feeling the bloom of new romance. From first date to current, she’s reveling in that intoxicating experience of getting to know someone.  I’m utterly thrilled for her!

My friend is classy, eloquent and highly impressive.  It sounds like her new beau is her equal on all counts. Rock on!

I wish I could say the same for myself.  I’ve got a fabulously awesome partner right now…but that wasn’t always the case.

To explain…I’m not the most orthodox gal.  I’m wired a little funky, and I don’t comply to society’s idea of femininity.

I could write a book about the epic failures I’ve had on first dates (or consecutive failed dates, for that matter).

I’ll suffice to just share this one…

Meet Ben.  Accountant.  Shy.  Well-meaning guy. A good guy.  Really trying hard to make an impression, but we both know within the first hour we’re not really a smart match.  We even admit it to each other!

As Ben relaxes a little, and the pressure is off (because we both know a 2nd date is out of the question), he asks me:

“So…Avia, if you were to describe yourself in under 5 minutes with total, brutal honesty…what would you say?”

This is not the question to ask a ridiculously honest Sagittarius who has had a few Lowenbrau’s on a date.  So I asked Ben, “Are you sure you want the low-down?”  He said, “Absolutely”, with a sly grin.

And this is what I said…

“Photographic memory.  Attended 4 prestigious colleges.  Kicked out of 3.  Earned a degree in Anthropology and a minor in Art with the college that didn’t give me the boot.

Don’t always follow the rules, but know how to conjugate a verb, and how to avoid dangling participles.

Multi-Lingual in HTML, XHTML, CSS, SEO, and not too shabby at Spanish.  Pretty sure I could get around in Italy too.

French horn player for 15 years. 3 of those years as a pro, and sat as an alternate for a major metropolitan symphony.

Refuse to drive an automatic.  Jeep driver, always with a standard.  Drove a 18-wheeler too.

Clocked 80,000 miles on a Harley Softail.  Super fun.

Put 3 people through school.  Donated thousands to charity. Support my local SPCA.

Been 250 pounds with a fantastic stuttering problem, compounded by an ugly skin condition and chained to an asthma inhaler.  Conquered all that in my 30s.

A product of two amazing parents who are still well-respected and completely awesome.”

There might have been more I divulged to Ben, but I remember keeping it under 5 minutes.

At the end of my deluge, all Ben had to say was this…

That’s all well and good, but you have a big piece of spinach between your front teeth.

Isn’t that nice!?!?

This brings me to the point of this post…

Was I bragging to Ben?  Am I bragging to you?  Yeah…maybe I was, and maybe I am.

But the Universe has a funny way of bringing us down a notch.

It’s fabulous to be aware and proud of our remarkable achievements through our lifetime.  But my experience has taught me not pull out the braggadocio to the enth degree.  Lest we get caught bragging with spinach in our teeth! LOL!

Mostly, I want this post to remind all of us that it’s not what we say about our achievements….it’s what we do with them.  I’ve learned to live as an example…not just talk about stuff I’ve done.

Being a mentor,  an illustration of the best action is the most effective tact in showing others what we’re made of, in my opinion.

Just thinkin’.

xo

PS:  And learning how to laugh at ourselves is a major plus. (see image above).  ;)

FYI:  Ben and I still keep in touch via pen-pal.  He’s a great guy.

 

 

 

 

 

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Picking Off the Labels…(a right-good rant)…

Sunday, February 2nd, 2014

SadPickingLabelsOff

The only thing I have ever run away from in life is labeling. I have this neurotic aversion to being labeled, judged or pegged into a constricted personality-type.

It’s the terror of being pigeon-holed that keeps me running like Roger Bannister away from labels. Slap one on…and what if it won’t come off???

This is why ‘branding’ in the world of marketing is a challenge for me. I just don’t fit.  I suspect many of you don’t fit either…and that is a VERY good thing.

Thankfully, you and I  have far greater forces working for us than the powers of PR. ;)

We have Divine Design on our side.  We have the variability of the Universe working on behalf of our uniqueness.  Our world, our galaxy, our lives….these are all highly diverse.  I say so diverse that labeling and square-pegging is neigh-on impossible.

How can you contain something so monumentally awesome as…let’s say….the Andes mountains, or the Grand Canyon, or the intricacies you experience with your children, or a bit of basil seed thrusting itself out of the soil to reach the sun?  There are so many colorful threads in our lives – it’s just plain silly to water-down our experiences with stupid labels and stereotypes.

If you haven’t guessed by now…I’m on a right-good rant.  I’m pretty gosh-darned sick of stereotypes, conformity, and what “should be”.   I say we should be who we are without compromise.

Of course, my practical side will admonish acting out in unhealthy ways.  I mean….we do live in a society, and that entails living within certain parameters.

Perhaps we might all aspire to be wildly special in an effort to uplift humankind.  Meaning….what if we strived to be unique and special with a goal to help our community, our society, our Mother Earth?

We’ve all run into people who behave weirdly for the sake of being weird.  There’s nothing necessarily wrong with that…but what is the purpose?  I’m suggesting we take our diverse, beautiful perspectives and apply them to the world-at-large.  Let’s gather up our quirkiness.  Let’s gather up our weirdness’s.  Let’s take all our odd ways and channel them into a focused beam of delight that pours out in our families, our communities, our social circles, our work-places.

I say to heck with labels.  None of us are capable of being fitted with a trite definition.  We’re not soup cans, for crying out loud.  We’re not a list of ingredients, or a tally of calories.

We are human.  We are massive.  I’ll go so far and say we are beyond our capacity to understand our potential.

I’m a big fan of the human potential movement.  I think all of us (self included) are far more capable of moving beyond the mundane than we realize.

PickingLabelsOffUniformityBeUnique

What’s my point to all this?  As always…I have bullet points to summarize (just love those bullet points!):

    • Do not cow-tow to a label.  Just because a parent, a friend or someone you respect dubbed you as this, that or the other – it does NOT imply the truth.  The truth is – you are infinite.  You are pure potential.  You are worthy.  You are a freaking rocket of expression.  Launch out of those stupid labels.  You are NOT what people define you as.  You are what YOU dream yourself to be.  Remember that.  Embrace that.

 

    • Your unorthodoxy is an asset. Don’t allow anyone to tell you different.  My friend’s Aunt Thelma crafts blankets out of cat hair.  I think that is weird, but very awesome.  Those blankets are so warm and fluffy!  Is it proper?  Is it conventional?  Perhaps not.  But Aunt Thelma provides warmth to the Senior Center in Wisconsin, and I tell you – those folks love her cat-hair blankets!  It’s the thought involved.  It’s the ingenuity.  It’s the love and care in what we do that counts.  Be brave in your uniqueness.  Dare to give.  Dare to love.  Dare to be different.

 

    • If you think no one understands you…then accept that, because you’re probably right.  You don’t need the understanding of others to be your exquisitely awesome self.  All you need is belief in yourself.  I tell you – the kindling of your own soul is the only fuel you need to stand out an make a difference.

 

    • Okay…so maybe you have problems.  Goodness knows I have problems too.  They are not insurmountable.  In fact, many of our problems provide a fabulous platform for extraordinary growth, healing and perspective.  When we stretch our imaginations to make our problems assets – that’s the real deal.  It’s uncanny how our conflict can work in our favor.  Don’t down-trod yourself if you have an affliction.  Rather, try to turn that negative into a positive.  Just ponder it.  You might be surprised how a perceived handicap can evolve into a major benefit to you, your community and beyond.

 

    • Never get pegged.  I think the foremost irritation for me is observing media, and seeing all the “follow the leader” baloney.   I don’t think humans were meant to follow.  We are brilliant creations.  We are the utmost in terms of ability, potential and creativity.  Seeing my fellow man following the heard just grinds me.  We are so much more than what society deems us.  We are capable of so much.  It’s those stupid pegs that get us in a rut of disbelief about our ability.  Don’t get pegged!

 

Well, my friends, I don’t know if you feel better after this rant, but I certainly do.

Thank you for allowing me this space to spew out my frustration.  And thank you for your open-mindedness….to read and discern the real truth I hoped to convey.

In the end…just be YOU!  There is no one alive on this planet  like you.  The world needs you.  Your unusualness, your difference, your special view – we all need you.

As always, bright blessings,

Avia

 

 

 

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Symbolic Icicle Meanings

Sunday, January 19th, 2014

IcicleMeaning

Symbolism of Icicle Meanings

For me, everything casts a glimmer of symbolic meaning, and icicles are no different. When I see them hanging off my house, in my dreams or visions I get very distinct and symbolic impressions. These impressions reveal deeper meaning and allow me to form a symbolic narrative – a story that expresses meaning through metaphor.

Some of these impressions are quite personal. For example, years ago, I served as a ‘big sister’ to Margaret, a little sprite of a girl who had trouble pronouncing the word ‘icicle.’ Every time she said the word it came out sounding like ‘ice-giggle.’ How endearing! To this day, I call them ice-giggles because icicles convey a kind of crystal-joy for me, and remind me of Margaret and her cheerful nature.

In esoteric symbolism, icicles share common symbolic threads with water. Water is esoterically symbolic of emotion, intuition, fluidity and moving in sync with the currents of life.

In a frozen state, water takes on a stoic or suspended personality. This prompts me to consider icicles as a message of stepping back from potentially torrential emotions. In other words, icicles are a reminder to be still, and channel our emotional floodgates into a more manageable flow.

Consider your own emotional status. Instead of stewing in a pool of emotional chaos, icicles convey a need to slow down, cool off, hang out, and reduce emotional flooding down to a more manageable drip-drop pace.

Speaking of pace, my predominant symbolic assessment of icicles deals with time. When I see them lumbering along frosty ledges and sills, I’m struck by the evolutionary progress of time, the seasons, and the revolutions of our world.

In fact, icicles (for me) conjure a visual likeness to hourglasses. And just like an hourglass gradually passes time with every grain of sand, so too do icicles count the passage time with every melty drop they emit from their bodies. Interestingly, the hourglass is a sacred symbol for Temperantia, the Roman goddess of moderation and balance. This round-a-bout way of symbolic connection prompts us to employ temperance when dealing with our emotions.

From a time-focused (hourglass) perspective, icicles count down the transition from winter to spring. This is an important metaphor. We all get ‘stuck’ sometimes, frozen in our own fears or indecision. This kind of stuck-ness is akin to the winter of our discontent, and incorporating the idea of icicles melting through our frozen stupor can reassure us that ‘this too shall pass.’

So, the next time you feel seized or frozen in life, consider the nature of the icicle: Wise in the way of transition, and a reminder that the tide of life always turns, and a message of balance. Contemplate each soft drop falling from the tip of the icicle as another step in the direction towards the spring-time of our lives.

May all your ice-giggles melt into warm smiles and bright laughter. :)

If you enjoyed this post on symbolic icicle meanings, check out a few of my other symbolic insights:

Symbolism of Water

Symbolism of the Seasons

Undine Meanings (elementals of water)

Meaning of Death and Loss

 

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